We are going to try something new.
It takes 21 days to create a new habit and we want to create an entire new life/family rhythm. Seeing that we have more ideas than one family can shake a stick at, we need to be efficient with how we spend our time. It’s summer and we live in one of the best places to frolic and play and we certainly aren’t going to give up fun. No way — it’s too important. It feels like we need another six hours added onto the day, but that can’t be right because I’m pretty sure nature has things worked out perfectly.
We had a long drive home from our impromptu vacation this past Saturday and we used our time to reflect on what we could change when we got back home in order to optimally enjoy our life experience and simultaneously be working towards our goals and dreams. We are all craving a little more rhythm in our lives. We like to live off-the-cuff, but sometimes we need to reel ourselves in and find some solid ground. Since we don’t have regular jobs and we don’t send the kids to school our week can be a blank slate. Yes, this is fun and exciting after living an institutionalized lifestyle for the first twenty-odd years of life, but we’ve realized (after letting it all go to the wind) that we want to create our own week with a rhythm and flow that is custom designed just for us.
The Good Life: The Nearing’s Time Formula
Way back when we read The Good Life by Scott and Helen Nearing. They left the big city back in 1932 with a little cash and big dreams of living “the good life”. Their successful homesteading experience was an early inspiration for us and part of the reason why we went and lived in the Appalachian Mountains on a medicinal herb farm when we were first married. We saw deep value in how they lived and we wanted to know wellness through simple living. We’re back in a (small) city now, but I think the lessons they learned can serve us city folk too.
The Nearings broke their day into three, four-hour parts separated by meals and rest. Each part of the day was assigned a function: work for money, work on homestead and personal work (writing/personal projects/hobbies etc.).
Our Good Life: Custom Designed
We are obviously in a different situation. Helen and Scott did not have children which accounts for a lot of their extra “work” time, but I am thankful that my children remind us to PLAY!
Our family needs time for: Stone to work; Mama to work; children to play; family togetherness; exploring future vocational work; home projects; gathering and preparing slow, nutritiously dense foods; personal hobbies and interests. Oh and we need to sleep!
In order to maximize our children’s need for play, our need to work and the family’s need for together time we came up with a plan for The Work Week and The Weekend.
The Work Week
Our work week is four days long. I have never agreed with the 5/2, work/weekend ratio. It’s imbalanced. 4/3 feel much better.
The work week starts Sunday evening and ends Thursday afternoon and will be broken into three shifts: Morning, Afternoon and Evening.
Stone and I will each spend one shift working, one shift with the kids and the evening is slated for family. The morning and afternoon shifts are movable so we will decide who is working in the morning and afternoon based on the specifics of the day. This means that the boys will spend the morning with Mom and the afternoon with Dad, or vice versa.
Right now Stone may have to take some longer shifts because we are relying on his work to provide for us financially. Our goal is that by giving me regular work space and time I can start to bring in some well-deserved finances and he can shift back on his work. Oh, the fine art of balance!
In the early evening we will spend it together having dinner, taking walks, playing music, reading, and bedtime and then in the later evenings we can have grown-up time to spend together (wink), practice yoga and work on personal hobbies (sewing, knitting and repurposing, and reading up on earth building, aquaculture, primitive technology etc.)
The Weekend
The weekend starts Thursday evening and goes through Sunday afternoon.
Thursday evening we grab dinner at downtown farmers market, live music on The Commons and then hike up the big hill to Cornell for exercise and the view. The kids fall asleep in the double jogging stroller and we have a date on top of the world!
Friday is slated for any work session overflow, laundry, big house clean etc. Saturday is for field-trips, house projects and farmers market. Sunday morning is for a nature hikes and altar building and a trip to the Co-op in the afternoon. Friday and Saturday nights are for friends, dinner parties, movies, wine and local beer, merry music making and evenings on the front porch.
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So, we are going to try this out for 21 days and then reassess what is working and how we can improve. I’m sure we’ll do a little tweaking within the three weeks, but the idea is to use a little bit of loving discipline because we want our Big Picture to look like our dreams!
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
LOL I post about letting go and flowing with the natural rhythms and you post about creating new ones. Gotta love the way life takes us in different directions at different times, all towards the same thing. :)
I hope this new rhythm works well for you guys (or shows you what will). I’d love if Justin has a 4 day work week. He’s feeling really unhappy about work lately. I can’t wait until the financial burden is no longer on his shoulders alone. I asked him if he’s ready for a career change but he’s not sure. It sure does suck to hate to go to work everyday though. :( Hopefully when he loses the crappy partner he’s paired with things will start to look up for him.
~Tara
oh my friend…i just *love* how you and stone work together to create such a beautiful, intentional family experience.
i will be eagerly following your journey and enjoying watching the magic unfold!
what a great plan. it’s so great that you’re striving for some balance in your family.
Love this post as well, especially the three different segments of the day. I’ve always been interested in reading this book you mention – will have to check it out!
Jamie
The Good Life was such an inspiring and informative book. While reading it, I was ready to say my goodbyes to city life and brave it in the country. For multiple reasons, I’ll have to hold off on that idea, but I’m glad to know that it continues to inspire others to finding their own version of the good life.
Have fun!